Why Couldn't It Have Been Hulk Hogan? The Macho Madness Ends, and a look back at the Macho Man Miss Elizabeth Wedding.

Prefer to look back at the good times. The following moment was perhaps the best and the worst, the blurst if you will.

"I'm 82 years old." "Some Might Say 82 years young!" "Up your ass"

Eventually, every clip ever makes it onto youtube. Here's one the Big Dood saw years ago and not again since, a grizzled World War II putting a peppy morning news whippersnapper in his place.

Dante's New Inferno: Colonel Sanders Abyss of Fried Chicken Preparation aka Inferno Sauce

A heretofore uncharted by Dante level of hell, where Colonel Sanders toils in a beige-and-gray colored abysss doomed to forever coat mutant chickens in a batter most foul. 

Does anyone find anything remotely realistic or enticing about that picture? Fucked. 

Marseille Sportages

Boule (similar to bocce) requires the simplest sporting area I've ever seen- a patch of flat dirt. (The Central Park Conservancy would love this, no grass to worry about, and minimal upkeep.) Phenomenally, they call these Boulodromes (perhaps this is what Krang does in his free time?)



Or, if that court (pitch?) is too lowbrow and/or near traffic for the local boule-r (because, you know, it's only in the shadow of a ONE THOUSAND YEAR OLD CHURCH), perhaps this is a more acceptable spot- a Boulodrome IN A FORT, WITH A CUTOUT OVERLOOKING THE MEDITERRANEAN (couldn't get it in the pic, but trust me, it's there).



Then, after a tiring, sweaty afternoon of bouling, cool yourself off here:

Arnold Schwarzenegger Maria Shriver Divorce Cheap Photoshop Gag

Plenty More Where That Came From

I can't get enough. Gimme more of these beats.

The Assaut Continues

This should fire you up for a Monday morning. (The title, loosely translated, means "My Man".)

Say Hello To My Parisien Friend

Who do I trust? me, that's who.



Catchin wreck in Marseille:



Catchin something else:

Francais Hey

A damning statement on the state of French rap- spotted through a runoff grate outside the Louvre:


However, still keeping it real (French):


Who knew Onyx was still at it, sailing in the south of France?

Mario Joyner is Not Bigtime Enough to Bigtime his fans

Here's a pic of comedian Mario Joyner, eating, appropriately, alone at the new M Street Kitchen in Santa Monica (happy hour $6 for burger/fries $3 for a beer ya heard?). Mario Joyner, star of 1991's "Hangin with the Homeboys." Mario Joyner, the man who bigtimed the biz at Santa Monica's wildly overrated Father's Office bar two years ago. Mario Joyner, a man who should have been grateful that the biz even recognized him. Here's his website. 

Marseille-Hey

Back from France.


I keep dancehall strong.


Would it be worth going back to Marseille next week just for this concert? Judging from this banger (c/o MZA), it may just be.

Osama Bin Laden is Dead, but Bin Laden Weed Lives On

Mane check this shit out we was up in Chicago right
With my n---a big hamp the n---a pass me a blunt
Like smoke this shit n---a this some bin laden weed
Y'all don't know nothing bout this down south
What the fuck is bin laden weed its three different
Kinds of weed all grown together that shit some straight killer
Them Chicago n---z call  it bin laden mane some straight fire

[chorus 4x's]
Who got that hydro
Who got that light green
Who got that Bobby brown
Who got that laden weed

Mario Balotelli Super Euro Nike Ill Kicks Commercial

In honour of Bizman's Euro adventures comes a super Euro advert. Don't click on the related youtube links unless you want to delve into the world of Italian hip hop and techno. Ziti.

Over the Fucking Top

Hagar. Stallone. "The Winner Takes it All." We're all winners. via biz a few months ago.

The Best Part of Waking Up

from this Flickr page

Guardian Photoshop Contest for American Takeover of Arsenal Produces Gems

Your pal Coachie had nothing in the latest Guardian photoshop contest about Stan Kroenke's takeover of Arsenal, the brilliant image above rightly won this round. The rest of the entries are also amusing.

An Amazing Portrait of Mob Boss Joseph "Big Joey" Massimo by the Courthouse Artist Duo of Andrea and Shirley Shepard

His face, a soupy ragu of resignation and contempt. His froggy neck, a sad reminder of our petty rejection of Bill Bradley. His track suit emblematic of the mafia's, and our, loss of sartorial style. The increase in society's pop culture interest in the mafia over the past 10 years is converse to the mob's ability to entertain. Would John Gotti ever be painted looking this bad?
And just who painted this masterpiece? The secret superstar mother-daughter team of Andrea and Shirley Shepard, profiled in this New York Times piece.This portrait should hang in the Museum of Modern Art, because that's exactly what it is.

Y'all Ready For This?

Tha Shiznit.

Beastie Boys Celebrate Release of New Album Hot Sauce Committee Part Two With Video Starring Everyone Ever

Stuy High represent.

via The Offside Rules

After A Millennia of Terror, Stretching Across the Cosmos from Cybertron to the Planet Earth the Mighty Megatron has Been Killed

Megatron kinda looks like Chris Tucker. From the Post.