LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh on the New York Knicks; ESPN's Silly Fantasy

 

so hot right now

 ESPN's Gene Wojciechowski checks in with a silly throwaway column today, fantasizing, nay, drooling over the prospect of LeG.O.D.D., Dwyane "Remember how shitty Dominique was in the latter part of his career" Wade, and Chris "Despite having decent talent around me I've never lead the Raptors out of the First Round in the shitty Eastern Conference but pay me like I'm a franchise" Bosh all suiting up at MSG next season. Left unsaid is the promise of wild nights spent sipping with Harvey Weinstein and Ron Howard.

 Here are some choice lowlights from the piece:

"LeBron could leave $30 million on the table if he ditches the Cavs.
I'd ditch them. If you're really serious about creating a brand and a basketball legacy, do something that's never been done before"

Probably hasn't been done before because it's not a good idea. Like when Kobe wised up by re-upping with the Lakers instead of jumping ship to the Clippers. LeBron's been on a championship caliber-team for three years now, why risk is to jump to one of the worst organizations in the league, the one with no playoff wins since 2000, and the one which will surround him with absolute garbage? And all that for way less money! But drinks at the 40/40 with Harvey Weinstein!

"But if James, Wade and Bosh truly want to make history, they could do the unthinkable and split the Knicks' $33 million three ways. It would cost them salary money, but can you imagine how much they'd make on the back end if they started reeling in NBA titles? In New York?"

They could cut a jam with Alicia Keys! Get lucrative endoresements like starring alongside Clyde and Mex in a Just for Men commercial! Be chastised by Mayor Bloomberg (watch that salt Boshie!)! Be caught leaving Kate Hudson's apartment and have your sorry mug splashed on the front page of the Post! They can eat a bagel.......with a schmear!!!!!

I'm not all hate tho, he did have one good line:
"So it's not as if Bosh is ordering the 89-cent, five-layer burrito from Denise."
I love that commercial, the eagerness of the deryl ordering the burritois a magical feeling of anticipation and excitement that I know all too well.