Monday, September 13, 2010

Meet the 2011 Mets, The Same as the 2010 Mets aka B.O.H.I.C.A.

Let's take a guess at the 2011 Mets and see if we can get pumped.
C: Josh Thole
1B: Ike Davis
2B: Luis Castillo (perhaps sprinkled with .200 hitter Ruben Tejada)
SS: Jose Reyes
3B: David Wright
LF: Jason Bay (considering the Met history with concussions, Ryan Church, David Wright, Bay, etc, shouldn't the team be trailblazers and mandate that they all use the new Gazoo-type helmet that will protect players significantly better? Bay suffered his in the field, but still)
CF: Carlos Beltran aka Carblows Blowtran
RF: Angel Pagan
Rotation:
1. Johan Santana aka Blowhan Can'tana whenever he returns next spring, certainly not in April.
2. Jon Niese
3. Mike Pelfrey aka Big Fucking Pelf aka Fucking Big Pelf
4. R.A. Dickey; who has, at the very least, earned a shot at starting again next year but really, how can he keep this up?
5. P.P. Scrapheapo (the P.P.  is for poo-poo)
Closer: Bobby Parnell?
Manager: Someone cheap yet able to energize the chump fan base aka Lee Mazzilli
Sprinkle a couple of retread reclamation bench players and there you go. Not much to get pumped for, eh?

2 comments:

Biz said...

Yikes. When does the 2011 football season start?

Fred Coupon said...

I could put up with mediocrity if at the very least Ollie and Luis were booted this winter. Replacing them with league minimum guys would provide the team with another 1-2 wins.

But we all know they're not going anywhere. Godforbid anyone in the Coupon family (UM grads to boot) knows the definition of 'sunk cost.'