Monday, February 08, 2010

Zombie Football; Also EPL Talk's Premier Leage Footballer of the Week

If you're looking for a distraction at work or a diversion in general, I recommend a new flash game called zombie football. Minutes upon minutes of fun. Less to do with soccer, more with killing zombies.
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Also, I've designed a logo for a new feature at EPL Talk highlighting a player of the week. Those of you out there who like Arsenal may dig author Jesse Chula's characterization of the club as "beautiful passing gnomes."

Friday, February 05, 2010

10th Anniversary of Big Pun's Death; I just lost a hundred pounds, I'm trying to live."

"I just lost a hundred pounds/I'm trying to live."
Like a prior generation with JFK's death, I remember exactly where I was when I learned of Pun's passing. I had just copped the Post from the deli in Broome and was walking up Centre past Hoomos Asli. Of course, the Post wrote the story up humorosly. And I admit, I kinda chuckled at the news. It wasn't exactly a surprise at that point as the word was that he was close to 700 pounds. A few years later, we saw him in his last film role in "Urban Menace," motionless in his chair in every scene, wheezing his words like a sad Don Corleone or Muttley the cartoon dog. Which makes the words and feeling of "It's So Hard" so poignant. No mention of Big Pun and his legacy is complete without the sad, shocking and infamous story of him pistol-whipping his wife.

There's no doubt that his brand of catchy, poppy street rap would have propelled him to great success in the 2000s had he lived. He had mainstream appeal, yet was so well thought of by true heads that myths multiplied about rhyme books he left behind. Fat Joe himself was forced to defend himself against allegations that he built his career on ghost-written Pun rhymes on the (sincerely) epic Ja Rule/Fat Joe/Jadakiss track "New York."

There's no doubt that Fat Joe enjoyed a late-career renaissance in the years following his one-time protege's passing. And there's no doubt that every rapper since that has parlayed street cred into mainstream club-bangers owes him a debt.

Bigger Oscar Change Than 10 Best Picture Nomininees.

The Oscar nominations came out this week. The big change this year was to double the amount of nominees to ten. The stated reasons for this change are to improve ratings and to reward more popular fare. The sports analogy would be to increase the amount of playoff teams. Every league has done this to varying degrees of success. The NCAA is currently considering a proposal to expand March Madness to 96 teams.

The risk is losing credibility. An award is only as strong as the respect it carries, lest an Oscar become a Spike TV award. Of course, the Oscars can't have much credibility left after awarding Best Picture to "The Departed." 10 movies are a lot to keep track of and compare to one another. What do "Avatar" and "The Hurt Locker" have in common besides directors who once boned? Seems as if the Golden Globes, in dividing movies into categories, do it better. By doing so, the Globes allow all kinds of movies to get their shine on without having to compare a well-done comedy to a well-done tearjerker to a well-done historical drama. Worth noting that the Oscars have historically completely excluded comedy and action movies.

There's a bigger Oscar change that's been given scant attention. Up till this year, every Academy voter made one choice in each category, the choice with the most votes won. This year, the Best Picture will be chosen by a preferential voting system wherein voters rank their best picture choices from 1 to 10. Under this first-past-the-post system, which is similar to voting in some parliamentary democracies, each movie will be ranked by the number of first-place votes, if one film has more than 50% of the votes in the first round then it is the winner. With 10 choices, this is unlikely, so then the movie with the least first-place votes is tossed and its voters will have their 2nd-place choices redistributed amongst the remaining movies.

Rinse and repeat until one movie gets past 50%. This could create a scenario where a movie wins Best Picture despite not being chosen 1st by the most number of voters. Or, as the LA Times pointed out, a repeat of the 2000 presidential election. Headache.
pics courtesy of Life Magazine

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Baseball Hall of Fame Members Should Wear Blank Hats on Their Plaques

 
Lionel Richie played a mean right field.
Andre Dawson will go into the Hall of Fame wearing a Montreal Expo cap, as opposed to his desired Chicago Cub. The 'Spos have one other player in the Hall, Gary Carter. He didn't want to go in as an Expo either, but the Hall of Fame took the choice out of the players' hands a few years back in the wake of rumors that Wade Boggs was willing to take compensation to wear a Tampa Bay Devil Ray cap.

As players from the past 20 years begin to be considered for induction, the cap decision will only get harder. Players like Mike Piazza, Manny Ramirez, and Alex Rodriguez, amongst others, are strongly associated with two teams. Even where the choice is clear, stars change teams far more often than in the past. The only logical step is to have players wear blank caps. Or better yet, no caps at all. In light of some of the more garish modern hats (Blue Jays, Diamondbacks, Devil Rays, Astros and Brewers) it would certainly be more dignified. Moreover, just as players change teams, teams change hats far more often. Several teams wear as many as three different hats. Should Craig Biggio or Jeff Bagwell make the Hall, which of the thirty different hats they wore during their careers in Houston be immortalized on their plaque? Same question for Pudge and the Rangers. NFL Hall of Fame busts don't feature helmets. And, as seen in Joseph Tinker's plaque, not every player goes in wearing a team cap.

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Larry from Three's Company

Somewhere, in an alternate universe, Larry from "Three's Company grew older, lost a little hair, got a little more gaunt, got his heart broken for the first and only time and cut this record.

Monday, February 01, 2010

News : Roger Federer is the Greatest Tennis Player of the Open Era; Also, Selleck Waterfall Sandwich.

R-Fedz has repelled wave after wave of challengers to his throne. His streak of semi-final appearances is absurd. Yesterday (I think), Federer repelled the more powerful Andy Murray, shining brightest in an epic third-set tiebreak, prevailing 13-11. The 2010 Aussie Open title is the 16th of his career, the most titles for men in the Open era. He's won on all three surfaces and has won all four Grand Slams. He's defeated many different kinds of players by employing the pin-point-placement artistry of a Greg Maddux. Or perhaps more like Ted Williams, cuz he hits the ball where they aint.

The only disappointment was in seeing the Melbourne crowd and ESPN's announcers get so clearly behind Murray. Rooting for the underdog is a natural inclination. But Federer is the kind of player we only see once in a couple of generations. We should enjoy him while he is here.
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Also, props to Cannatar for finding Selleck Waterfall Sandwich. The anonymous artist behind these masterpieces of modern art should be applauded for staying so dedicated to his vision.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Gary Coleman Arrested; What Would Inspectah Deck Say?

Full props & pounds to Ego Trip for using the same line in one of their classic ads back in the day.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Happy Birthday Coachie!

Lawman Segal Out for Revenge, Donuts

After a hard day of work reading other people's emails, i sought to re-imagine my legal career via Steven Segal's new show, Lawman. While I can get usually my crime fix from MSNBC's "Lockup Raw: Blasted in the Ass by The Really Bad Guys in Indiana State Prison", A&E comes through with the goods on such shows as "The First 48", where hard nosed detectives acquire murder confessions from tweens duly misinformed of their Miranda rights, (by cop shows, natch) and appeals to "do the right thing" regardless of all the wrong that the system has done to them. But outrage soon overtook the gentle dreams that were hovering just out of reach.

When we are introduced to the Lawman, Segal is dressed in full cop regalia with high impact sunglasses, his jowls oozing over his collar. He and about ten cops in unnecessary SUV's drive by some people in the projects. They say "looks like some drug activity going on" (looks like friendly pounds to me) and promptly pull up, flash their lights, declare they smell weed, and cuff a young dunny while hurling harsh accusations. Said dunny gives a false name (the greatest offense of the night) and this predictably angers a cop. Then they look around and see his car nearby. They declare they smell weed and claim they see residue. They search the car throughly, and when they can't open the trunk, they call in a canine, which finds nothing as well. I would imagine a nice apology is in order for the blatant profiling, but instead, they get Lawman all over the innocent kid. They take the poor dood in for an unpaid parking ticket, but with the ominous voiceover music and b&w shots, you'd think he's gettin life. Segal doesn't try to defend the underdog, as his movie personna often does, instead murmuring assent to agressive tactics on innocents and confirming to excited arrestees that he is indeed, Segal. What's next, arresting the cast of the Jersey Shore for aggravated carb use, Bro?

R.I.P. Creepy Lady from Poltergeist.


Zelda Rubenstein, the creepy lady from Poltergeist, has passed away. She was also an early fighter for Aids awareness, featuring in a series of in-your-face ads like the one to the left.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

3 Unsurprising Headlines

MetsBlog - John Smoltz Leaning Towards Cardinals
(why would a rational 43-year-old who has already made over $135 million choose the dysfunctional Mets over a clear playoff contender with one of the best pitching coaches in baseball?)

FoxSports - Mets' Problems Go Deeper Than GM Minaya
(the Mets are close to surpassing the Knicks as the worst-run organization in New York. Speaking of the Dolans...)

New York Observer - After Three Months, Only 35 Subscriptions for Newsday's Web Site
(actually, this is surprising - what could have possibly motivated these 35 people to pay for the Newsday website?)

Black and White Photography Master Don McCullin


Not much of a topical hook, but continuing yesterday's theme of incredible photographs here is some of the work of Don McCullin. McCullin is most famous for his war photographs, from Vietnam and from the Middle East in the 1970s. An interesting factoid is that he used very basic equipment, a Nikon 35mm camera, and avoided using a flash, which makes his black and white images all the more powerful.

Ominous Foreshadowing a la Tupac?
 
A gang named the Guv'nors. 

Why OPC needed to build Delta City.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Robinho Leaving Man City for Santos; May Play Against Red Bull New York in New Jersey in March



Got a column up at EPL Talk discussing Robinho's potential move home to Santos in Brazil. Interestingy, Santos is scheduled to play Red Bull New York in March in the opening game of their new stadium in Harrison, New Jersey.

Elegantly Wasted; Photos of Famous Alcoholic Writers


Life Magazine soldiers on in internet form, and remains incredibly valuable for its archives. They began, somewhat recently, to organize some of their photos into interesting sets. One such set is this collection of photos of famous writers who drank famous amounts of booze and tossed off delicious quotes such as "[toss your] balls to the sea.....if you have any balls left," and "[t]o smoke opium is to get off the train while it is still moving." Enjoy.

Monday, January 25, 2010

South Beach Loses Out On Jets Fans Coming to the Super Bowl; also, From West Ham United to West Ham Olympic?


You won't get any expert analysis here. Seemed like the Colts TD at the end of the half was the turning point. Had the chance to go into the half up 17-6. Super bummer. And super bummer for recession-batterered Miami-area restaurants and clubs which no doubt would have preferred an infusion of New York/New Jerz play money rather than a bunch of Hoosiers. Not saying Hoosiers don't party, but bro, let's just say, they don't walk into a club and kill it. 
And while I was rooting for the Saints in the afternoon-cap, that pass interference call in OT was complete nonsense. Forget whether the ball was catchable or not, the dude tripped over himself. Sudden-Death OT is meaningless if a bad call puts a team in figgie pudding range. Hopefully this game becomes the impetus for OT rule changes, at least in the playoffs. Let the opposing team at least get a touch.

Got a piece up at EPL Talk about the new owners of West Ham United and their ambitious plans.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Gametime Snaxx

Hariyali Chicken -- the leafy greens will go well with the Jets jerseys. Beware, eatching too much of this is entirely possible, and could leave you looking like Rex Ryan.

serves 4-6 (prep time 15 minutes, marinate time 3-4 hours, cook time 20 mintes)
approx. 1 lb boneless chicken breast (for veggies, firm tofu would work really well here too)
4 tbsp oil
1 cup yogurt (use Greek yogurt to save time on draining)
1 tbsp finely chopped garlic
1 tbsp finely chopped ginger
1 cup chopped spinach
1 cup chopped methi (fenugreek leaves, can eliminate if hard to find, but provide a bitter zing to the sweetness of the spinach)
chopped green chiles to taste
salt/pepper to taste

Wrap in yogurt in cheesecloth and drain for an hour (or use greek yog).
Rinse and dry chicken.
Prick with fork and cut into bite sized cubes.
Chop the garlic, ginger, spinach, methi and chiles and combine to a paste.
Mix paste, yogurt and chicken and marinate for 3-4 hours.
Get oil in pan to high heat, and add chicken. Once browned, reduce heat and cook until tender and done.
Serve with lemon wedges.

The green is for J-E-T-S!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Poll: Should Manchester United Have Kept Carlos Tevez?



Got a column up at EPL Talk asking that question.

Also, Gary Matthews, Jr.!!! -phew- Ok, now I'm sure we can all feel good about the Mets this year. Think he'll fit in just fine with this anemic lineup.

The NBA Should Let Both Teams Wear Colored Jerseys During Games


"My colors, my honor, my colors, my all
With my colors upon me one soldier stands tall"

Ice-T-"Colors"
Thursday night's Haves-Fake Show tilt was thoroughly entertaining; capped by a Charles-Smith-esque-sequence where LeG.O.D.D. stuffed Pau "Mr. Uglyman" Gasol, Gasol went up again and got stuffed by Sideshow Bob. The ball fell to Shaq who gave the quick outlet to LBJ. LBJ raced upcourt, paused at the arch, then blasted past three defenders for the layup. Ballgames.

Making the game more of a joy to watch was the visual contrast between the Haves' faux-throwback wine-colored jerseys with the 80's wordmark up against the now-diluted-but-still-classic Fake Show yellow. Compare the 80's Lakers jersey with the current edition. The side-stripes add only clutter while robbing the power of all-yellow. Plus they took away a cool number font. Meanwhile, the Haves, like the Mets, seem to have 15 different jerseys. But unlike the Mets, almost all their jerseys look good.

NBA teams are visually associated with strong colors. Celtic green. Laker yellow-and-purple. Chicago red. Knick blue-and-orange. Warrior blue-and-yellow (well, at least what they used to be and what they should be). Spur black. Hornet teal.  Philly red-white-and-blue. Sonic green-and-yellow (-sigh-).

The Association should embrace their colors and allow both teams to wear colored jerseys during games. Imagine the Celtics in green going up against the Knicks in blue. The Bulls in red going up agasint the Pistons in blue. The Suns in orange going up against the Spurs in black. The Magic in teal going up against the Heat in red.

The notion that the home team wear white and the road team wear colors dates back to black-and-white tvs. I think we can tell which team is which nowadays. White jerseys are a bore, at least in the NBA. Think about jersey sales, how many people to you see walking around in NBA replica whites? Exactly. The Lakers, with their home yellow, had the right idea all along.