Friday, January 08, 2010

Juwan Howard is Alive, Well, Starting for the Portland Trailblazers and just dunked over Chris Kaman

This one's for Eric Montross.
I don't believe what my eyes just saw.

Earlier this year I was slightly surprised and somewhat happy to see that Juwan Howard is still ballin in the NBA. Howard is a link to one of my favorite teams as a wee coachie, Michigan's Fab Five. Me and half the country.

Injuries to Greg "Alas, Once-Mighty Thor, You Have Failed Me, Your All-Knowing Father," Oden and Joel "Thrilla in" Przybilla have forced Howard into the starting role. Maybe. Fuck if I know the ins and outs of the Blaze roster, maybe this was the plan all along.

Which brings me to last Monday night's game, a mildly entertaining tilt between the Rip City Blaze and the Paper Clips fromt the Office Supplies Center (thanks Peter Vescey!) got a jolt of Juwan late in the first half when Howard reached back through the decades to fucking throw it down over Chris "It's Not O-" Kaman. Seriously, please beleee me, see for yourself.

BCS Title Game Between Texas and Alabama was boring; further proof that America needs college football playoffs

Well now, that wasn't so much fun was it? True, it got exciting there at the end, but 'twas mostly a snoozefest of sloppy play, dropsies and turnovers. Although who doesn't love a good bit o' ballhawkin'?

Would the game not have been as sloppy had they not had a month off? True, the absence of Colt McCoy changed everything, but it wasn't like 'Bama super-impressed. Here are the scores of the title games dating back to 1998.

2009: Bama 37-Texas 21
2008: Gators 24-OK 14
2007: LSU 38-Bucknuts 24
2006: Gators 41-Bucknuts 14
2005: Texas 41-USC 38
2004: USC 55-OK 19
2003: LSU 21-OK 14
2002: Bucknuts 31-Tha UUUUUUU 24 (2OT)
2001: Tha UUUUUUU 37, 'Brasky 14
2000: OK 13-Seminoles 2
1999: Seminoles 46-Va Tech 29
1998: Tenn 23-Seminoles 16

The two memorable games were the Vince Young epic and the Maurice Clarett epic, with special mention for Michael Vick putting on a show in their loss to the Seminoles. Would playoffs keep teams sharp and ready to play in a title game? Perhaps. Just one more thing we'll never know as long as the Sea-Doo dreaming maniacs are in charge of college football.